In the spirit of getting things done, this is a suggested list of out of office replies.
1. I am currently out at a job interview and will reply to you if I
fail to get the position. Be prepared for my mood.
2. I will be unable to delete all the unread, worthless emails you
send me until I return from vacation on September 30th. Please be
patient and your mail will be deleted in the order it was received.
3. Thank you for your email. Your credit card has been charged $10.99
for the first ten words and $5.99 for each additional word in your
4. Thank you for your message, which has been added to a queuing
system. You are currently in 352nd place, and can expect to receive a
reply in approximately 19 weeks.