Originally Posted by gtderik
A couple things...
A. Many people don't react well to having things be pushed on them. This seems to be even MORE true for spice and significant others. It can work best to just do the work yourself, and if she is inspired to do the same because she sees the results, then great. IF not, then all the pushing in the world will result mostly in more resistance. This is due in part to there being an implicit message that "You are not good enough" which is not well received.
It could also be that she knows she could be better organized, but does not appreciate your reminding her of it. Maybe she prefers to try and solve the problem in her own way, or maybe she has other resistance to addressing that issue in her life at this time.
[Aside: I have spent 50 years being wildly dis-orgainzed and for some reason or the other, was never ready to change. It is famously quoted somewhere that we don't fear failure (which can be strangely comfortable) nearly much as we fear succeeding beyond our wildest dreams.]
B: If she views your use of GTD as a crutch, and makes you bad for it, this could be a reaction to the implicit suggestion that she is bad for NOT using GTD when you keep telling her she should. It could also be due to her being annoyed at how your use of GTD negatively impacts your relationship (e.g. interupts conversations, etc). So when she gets mad and says it is just a crutch, this could mostly be an emotional reaction, rather than a logically well thought out one. IMHO, both are valid, by the way.
Why not ask her what it is that bothers her?
Ask her what the difference is between something that helps you and is a good thing that betters your life, vs. a cructh which is somehow a bad thing. If she is detail-orieinted, ask her to be specific about what bad outcome happens by using GTD as a crutch?