Finding why I don't trust my system

[quantumgardener]

I'm interrupting my weekly review to bring you this confession. I don't trust my system.

David has often commented in his podcasts that if you're not using the system it is because you don't trust it. I still find myself prioritising and remembering what to do next from memory rather than my lists. It would be once a fortnight, at best, that I go into a list of next actions to see what I can do. My most useful list is @waiting for by far.

I am comfortable that I have my 10,000ft projects covered. The life goals aren't there yet. I mention that because I don't think that's the reason, rather I keep working on the last thing in the pile. Despite my intentions I don't seem to be able to finish A, look at list, select B, finish B. Instead I finish A, finish Z, finish D

Back to David's comment about trusting my system. I know it has the placeholders for much of what I have to remember (have you noticed like I have that I'm using much and most), and when I go back into it each week I've ticked off the major items as I would have prioritised them. It seems wrong to not be looking at the list each time. It gets worse in weeks like this where I have a backlog to process, however small, butting up against some big items.

Thought: I do the little things immediately though they usually take longer than 2 minutes in order to quieten interruptions and create space for the bigger things to occur. Then I react to the pressure of the big things having not occurred! A big thing is usually something that requires 2-3 hours to think and reflect. On further thinking a big thing is big because it is really something that I believe is fundamentally important.

I would benefit from hearing the experiences of others. This is not a technical implementation issue but an emotional one.

David

Update:
In the time since originally posting I've:

• Caught myself thinking, "I'll just do the minutes of the board meeting so that I have time to process my conference notes"
• Decided to put the board minutes aside and process my conference notes which I need to have organised for a meeting with the chairman tomorrow.
• Begun processing my conference notes
• Relaxed

That says it all.