I appreciate the ability to take a different view of my situation, and thank you for your kind responses. I agree that one of the things I need most is to try to take the pressure off and be patient with the slower success. Neither of those are things I excel at, so I guess this is an opportunity to work on some new, valuable skills. At least I am trying to view it that way!
I had the conversation with my husband about how there aren't enough hours in the day to get everything done to the level I have been attempting, and he was amazed that I thought I should do that in the first place. I'm comforted by the result but surprised that we hadn't had that conversation before. I didn't really realized that was such a big part of why I was feeling overwhelmed. Now that we are more aware that our communication is being somewhat of a move victim, we are both going to work on making sure we stay on top of it.
The other big issue we're always dealing with but that has become more pronounced during this busy time is hubby's ADD. To be fair one of the reasons his productivity has been suffering is because he had dr problems and had no medication for 6 weeks, but he has been reverting to his tunnel vision. Most of his efforts are going to spanish and work, and he hasn't even seen his home responsibilities deteroriating. We are trying a time blocking weekly schedule to make sure everything moves ahead at some pace even if it isn't enough to do it all. GTD is really a challenge for him. If he stops processing to do a 2 minute activity, he gets off in a new direction and doesn't go back to processing.
I suppose that is a problem for another day, I really appreciate the help in our developing a better plan and thank you much!